Zora Travels

Mother's Day

Slippered-feet pitter-pattered down the hallway yesterday at 7:45am.  It had been a rough night for all of us.  Nora is welcoming the arrival of her two-year molars...and they are causing quite the ruckus. She was up with screams and moans and wiggles every 1-2 hours all night long...I watched her on the monitor and waiting with baited breath for a few minutes each time to see if she'd fall back asleep or needed comfort.  Her 5:00am nursing session was non-negotiable and after rocking her to sleep until 5:30am, I fell into bed exhausted...praying that Daniel would let me sleep in.  (But, I mean, it was Mother's Day...so did he really have a choice?)

So, back to those pitter-pattering feet.  As the door creaked open, Nora was yammering on about something.  As I blinked in the rays of morning light pooling on the bed from the opening curtains...I caught her message, "Happy Mama's Day" she chirped over and over and over as she grasped at the comforter to pull herself up upon the bed.  What a mountain of changes have passed since last year's holiday to moms!  

 Mother's Day 2011

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My chubby, sparse-haired, one-tooth babbling baby has now become a running, curly-haired, toothy toddler.  After opening up some awesome gifts (a new video/photo pocket camera & summer maternity clothes), we enjoyed a beautiful day of blue skies and whipping winds down at Sunset Beach and then an evening at my mom's house.  

Nora was completely unamused by a windy beach or water that had loud and frothy waves licking at her toes.  It was not the "beach" of her recent memory down at the penninsula in Long Beach...the one with warm sand, no waves, and a gentle slope into the water that allows her to play up to her neck in the salty pool. She protested often and LOUDLY...and finally, she cracked us up so much with her misery, that we packed up and headed home for lunch.  Thanking our lucky stars for the beans and rice we had on hand. If you are looking to warm Lulu's heart, it's currently all about the Spanish rice and pinto beans...a veritable bucket of salt (although I rinse the beans vigorously).  She gobbles this concoction down and howls for it daily.

Here are some of the best pics of the day...and some videos from this year and last year.

 

 

Making castles with her dad.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Even little Smüdgie felt the warmth of the sun.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Me and my 22 week-old sweet pea.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Snuggles in the cold wind...complete with my unrubbed mineral-sunblock (Hello, Daniel!  Can you help a woman out?)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Investigating the sand between her toes.  She is obsessed with getting rid of any foreign debris in her toes and on her hands lately.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Her cheesy grin.  A new talent has arisen.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Her grin a year ago.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

One slightly-buried foot, one ruby-painted foot, and the tiniest one freaking out that it might get gritty.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Caught a picture with my step-dad, John.  A bbq in their gorgeous back yard to end the day!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Video Mania

The Day begins with a coached "excited face," "Happy Mama's Day!" and "I love you!"...but you can hear her sweet voice, coached or not! (Please ignore my just-woke-up hair...the cute factor overrode my vanity.)

Beach meltdown:

 

A year ago: Time is flying!

Whole Again

I am always telling my students to avoid cliches. I ask them to think beyond the overused to something more creative...yet, I sit here about to wax metaphorically about the birth of my child making me whole (yep, two were in that last sentence).

But this "making me whole again" captures in simplicity the entire journey for me from pregnancy to childbirth.

At nine I lost control of my body; I divorced my mental and physical realms long before my parents would divorce several years later.  Certainly there are various familial details to that ninth year that helped to create a desire to divide these two within myself but in adulthood I was fully responsible for continuing the madness.  But at that young age, I split into two enemy states - a mind that felt that the body betrayed...and a body that felt that the mind was weak...and at this point my flesh began to expand.  I gained weight in small and mighty leaps over the years.  Each year finding me just a bit more chubby, double-chinned, and self-conscious about it.

There are many people who have spoken heroically and passionately about loving their fleshy bodies.  Relishing the generous portions and ample offerings of a large vessel to carry their souls to and fro.  I was not one of these people.  I was an elementary school girl who heard boys make loud creaking sounds whenever I sat in the school desks (even now, I tear up instantly)...the middle school girl, who during javelin lessons in PE class, had Eddie Laferney (yeah, I put his real punk-ass name on here) chase me with a javelin making wild boar sounds, the high school girl, who on walking home from school, had boys jammed into a car slow down to match my pace, roll down their windows, and make pig noises as they cruised slowly alongside for several blocks as I cried.  

And I've tried diets, books, therapy, blah, blah, blahity, bloo-boo...but the fact remained that until recently there were still two firm encampments within me.  A mind that believed that I had an ugly grotesque huge body and a body that flew a flag with a motto that I had a weak mind, no will power, no strength, no possibility of success in a physical scenario.

And then came pregnancy.  From the moment that the plus sign materialized on that stick, the generals of these two armies started flying their respective white flags.  I began to intertwine the mental and physical journey of pregnancy for the sake of the little one who would after 40 weeks and 4 days of nourishment within me, enter the world and become the daughter that I again sustain yet again through nursing today.

Peace was made.  There was no need for an official treaty.  It has been since that joyous "dip stick" day that I've made an almost instantaneous and fluid conversion to harboring two parts of myself in harmony.  I sipped in pre-natal yoga classes and swam with all my might in water aerobics.  I followed the gestational diabetes diet and didn't even blink an eye.  I have forgiven my body for so long struggling to eat for nourishment's sake.  I have forgiven my mind for so long struggling to push emotions out of the way for another quesadilla.

And it isn't without reserve that I pronounce I am whole again; I know that people with food issues can sometimes cycle back.  Yet, in the present moment, a place that I try evermore to reside with more tranquility and acceptance, I am fully whole.

My body labored for 18 hours (oh, yeah, baby from 4:18am until 8:13pm) without a single medical intervention or drug and I pushed a baby out through focus, concentration, heavy breathing, and a fiercely dedicated mind.  The armies marched under the same flag, trumpets blared, my daughter was born, and I am simply whole.

 

Nuglett is a GIRL! Introducing Nora Maree

It is with a joyous heart and a big ol' smile that I can introduce our daughter, Nora Maree to the blogosphere.  Born at 8:13pm Friday evening.  It was 18 hours of a mesmerizing journey that I'll delve into another day.

We are home, happy, healthy, feeding, sleeping (more than I thought), and falling in love more each minute.

I suppose that the sentiment from an email that I sent out yesterday afternoon still remains the words of my heart:

"Motherhood is grand in both its preamble, verse, and chorus.  Sweet repetition of my daughter's eyes opening, lung bursting, hands flexing, and lips smacking are somehow never boring.  Fatherhood also has found Daniel dancing with his little girl while singing her Beatle's songs.  She was often serenaded to the melody of "Here Comes the Sun" and on our first morning together yesterday, the three of us danced to this song alone in the hospital room at the first morning light...Daniel whispering the sweet words in her tiny caramel ears...pure heaven!"

"Come get your blessings tonight, baby"

I've been working on a "laboring cd" for a few days now.  Started a bit late for my personality-type, I know, but it's finally done.  I found music on cd's buried in old boxes, in the car, on itunes, and through Pandora and Mornings Become Eclectic.  I started taking notes every morning on songs I liked but didn't know by name.

If you click on this link or the one below you will find the PERFECT song to invite Nuglett to join us.  Daniel discovered that this sexy-sexy-reggaeish song by Estelle would actually work for our overcooked baby.  We played it several times last night to my stomach.  D makes sweeping motions with his hands trying to usher Nugs down.  It's actually been very sweet the past week or longer how much he interacts with my belly.  I suppose I just always have because the little one is growing inside me...harder to ignore...even for a moment.

I see now why some people work up to their due date.  There are mornings after I've wished D a nice day, cleaned the kitchen, read the paper, and checked my email/facebook that I think of facing a day where I try and remain active in mind and body without television or shopping or going online.  Thankfully, friends or family are kidnapping me each day for walks, lunches, tea, errands, or scrapbooking outlets to keep me moving and thinking.

Something interesting...since the doctor says I can't go past next Friday, 9/24, without induction (I know I CAN ignore her)...if I don't go into labor, this will officially be our last weekend not being parents for the rest of our lives.  Maybe that's what Nuggie wants, one last weekend of us sleeping-in, lounging while reading the paper, some mellow yoga on our new bright rug, playing with the cats, long (wobbling) strolls, and breakfast at the Coffee Cup. 

I'm writing this blog post much earlier today due to a complaint issued from Mr. "Do you Feel Anything?" who simply wants time with me (and belly) at night and no tippity-tappity fingers on the blogosphere.

See what you think about the lyrics for an overdue and much-anticipated Noodle.

"Come Over" by Estelle lyrics--**click HERE to listen to the song**

If I was to tell you just how much I need you, would you come tonight
Or would you not believe me cause a love that easy never turns out right
I'm trying to change the rules you deserve something good in your life
We've waited for far too long so come get your blessings tonight baby


Won't you come over love, Sure I can show you love
Promise I got enough to give you all that you need baby
So many search to find, A love that is good as mine
I will not waste your time so bring it all to me baby

Baby let me teach you, give you love instruction, show you what I know
we should take it easy, ain't no need rush , no, baby nice and slow
All this love I can give to you, I expect just a bit in return
You don't have to be perfect love, as long as you're willing to learn baby


Won't you come over love, so I can show you love
Promise I got enough to give you all that you need baby
So many search to find a love that's as good as mine
I will not waste your time so bring it all to me baby

Turn out the lights, give you all of my love tonight
Let's do what lovers do, I'm ready for you **I know this is the ONE line that DOES not fit**
I don't want to waste your time
So don't make me beg tonight
and Don't keep me waiting for love
Won't you come over love

Still cookin'

Okay, so my maiden name means punctual.  I am ALWAYS on time.  The name long-since created this urgency of time and as a child my dad would often tell me of the absolute necessity of being where you are expected at the exact time you had committed.  If not, he reminded me, they will make jokes.  And not jokes that were creative or in any way witty...jokes like:

• "It's the early bird that gets the worm."
• "You're not early, you're late."

Brilliant, folks, just brilliant!  I hated these jokes...always followed by a chuckle and an upturned eyebrow as if I should clap like a seal at the jokester's mind-blowing ingenuity.

So, Nuglett, is already showing a bit more of his/her father's relaxed sense of time.  Daniel is completely casual and confident that the earth's axis does not tilt when we are a few minutes late.  He will actually purposefully SLOW DOWN getting ready if I am clicking back and forth across the wood floor.  I note although he would deny it, that his movements to tie his shoes or hang the discarded second-choice sweater back in the closet are unusually slow and his face painted with a serenity that makes me batty.  I am almost always, at this point, placing a text or call to our appointed local to announce that we will be a few minutes late.  Friends hosting a dinner party surely think I'm nuts when they read a text that says, "Sorry, but we're running 10 minutes behind;" however, it's always my father's voice and insistence that "tardiness is a form of disrespect" that echoes in my mind as I type them this message.

Well, I won't bother to list the things I tried to do today to instigate labor.  But I did figure that a healthy consumption of fiber would be a good way to start the morning.  Here is my scrambled eggs, broccoli slaw, mache lettuce, and whole-wheat pita breakfast (my sis-in-law, Kathy, the nutrition goddess is so proud of me right now).  If you look near the water glass, you can see two primrose oil capsules, one prenatal vitamin, and one fish oil capsule.  Oh, the things we've been doing with primrose oil (if you click on this song and know a bit about the birthing process) you'll understand.

My mom has also been a life saver.  Knowing that I have every desire to stay busy without leaving the house, she arrived today with bags of food (yup, both lunch AND dinner), six vibrantly-colored pots of mums ("for the MUM that you'll soon become") to decorate our front porch, and a twinkle in her eye as she performed a little touchy-feely for Nuggie's head.

Now how many mom's arrive with not only amazing (and spicy) chicken-tortilla soup and gardening whimsy, but after chopping the cilantro garnish and arranging the flower pots, then perform a pelvic exam?  And did I mention that she also whipped-up some wedding scrapbook pages like Martha Frickin' Stewart?  I'm a lucky girl, yes indeedy.

  

Due Date

Today is Nuglett's due date.  Since early January this date has been marked on many a calendar of mine, of Daniel's, of family and of friends.  Yet, there is nary a lick of action.  My cell phone rings and receives texts all day with many many loved ones expressing various sentiments of, "How are you feeling?" or "What's happening?"  But I just don't have the stomach to keep repeating -- "nothing" -- so I don't answer.

Nuglett has a good life.  It's dark, warm, music plays occasionally, kind voices garble just beyond the slick sack, sustenance is of no concern...alas, movement is a bit tight, but pokes and prods are still possible.  I don't blame Noodle for staying in but I must admit that several weeks ago when my mom and two aunts told me of how NONE of them ever neared their due dates...and neither did my grandmother...that my mind was quite fixated on the idea that Nugs would join us early.

Daniel has found himself less than productive at work and far more interested in giving me back rubs, sympathetic gazes, walking prods, and snacks.  I can't complain about him "working from home"...although it does slightly interfere with my mid-afternoon Dexter viewing. (He's tragically a Dexter-hater!)

I wrote another letter to Nugs today.  Inside of a turquoise journal covered with flowers and peace signs and birds are many short notes scrawled since February.  It will be such fun to one day give them to Nuggie.

The photo above was taken this afternoon...on a date that we for sure thought we'd be parents.  Will it be the last belly shot?

But, hey, yet another evening of cuddling, taking an uninterrupted long hot shower, reading lazily in bed...and maybe sleeping in ONE more time to a ridiculous (sometime after 9:30am) time.

FWD: The one that I opened

I loath email forwards.  Actually, 99.9% of the time I delete them without opening them no matter who sent them.  But today...yet another "waiting for Nuglett" day...I decided to open one from my sister-in-law, Kathy.  Here's how I answered the "Bucket List."  It's all I can muster up at 11:37pm...a night when I feel a LITTLE something but not enough to actually think something is happening.  Just sleep and hope that Noodle comes before Dr. C. says it's time for her to intervene.  She is worried about a recent blood  test and said today, "I may need to deliver the baby sooner."  I felt so removed from the birth equation by this statement.  An equation that I really would like to be a part of...but I know the focus is a healthy Nuggles at the end of the day.

Thus, here's my bucket list email...my mind is full and my body is a bit tired tonight!  My cervix...well, that's a bit too much information.  But the magic number is 10!

A  Bucket  List
 
 
Hit  forward and place an x by all the things you've done and  remove the x 
from the ones you have not, and send it  to your friends (including me).  
Whether you've done this  before, be a good sport and do it  again! 
  
This  is your  life:
 
(X )Shot a  shot gun  (only if a beebee gun counts!)
( X) Gone on a blind date
(X) Skipped  school  
( X ) Watched someone die  
(X) Visited Canada   
( )  Visited Alaska   
(  )  Visited Cuba     
( X)  Visited Europe 
( )  Visited South America 
( X ) Visited Las Vegas    
(X )Visited Mexico  

(  )  Visited Florida
( X ) Seen  the Grand Canyon 

(X) Flown on a  plane  
(  )  Served on a Jury  
(X) Been  lost 
( X)  Traveled to the opposite side of the  country.   
( )  Visited Washington, DC   
(X) Swam in the  Ocean
(X)  Cried yourself to sleep  
(X) Played Cops and  Robbers 
( X )  Played Cowboys and  Indians 

(X )  Recently colored with crayons  
(X )  Sang Karaoke 
(X ) Paid for a meal with coins only  
(X) Made  prank phone calls    
(X) Laughed until some  beverage came out of your nose 
(X)  Caught a snowflake on your tongue  
( X ) Danced in the  rain  
(X)  Written  a letter to Santa Claus
(X)  Kissed under the mistletoe
( X )  Loved someone who broke your  heart 
(X)  Watched the sunrise with someone  
(X) Blown  bubbles  
( X )  Gone ice  skating  
( X) Gone  skiing or  snow  boarding
(X)  Camped out under the stars 
(X) Seen something so  beautiful that it took your breath  away 
(X)  Been married  
(X..??? almost) Have children   
(X)  Had a pet    
( X)  Been skinny-dipping  outdoors  
(X)  Been fishing  
(X)  Been boating                                        
(X) Been  Water Skiing
(X)  Been Hiking  
(X ) Been  camping in a  trailer/RV
(X) Been  camping in a tent 
(  )  Flown in a small 4-seater airplane 
(  )  Flown in a glider  
(  ) Flown  in a helicopter  

(  ) Flown in a hot air  balloon 

(  )  Driven a Motorcycle 

(  ) Been  bungee-jumping  
(X) Gone  to a drive-in movie  
(  ) Done something that should  have killed you?  
(X) Done something that you will  regret (feel sad about) for the rest of  your  life. 
( X ) Visited Africa    
( ) Rode  an elephant 
(X)  Eaten just cookies for dinner  
(X) Been  on T.V.  
( ) Steal any traffic  signs  
(X) Been in a car  accident  
( ) Bailed out of  Helicopter/Plane 

( )  Went Curling    
( )Have a tattoo? 
(X) body  Piercing?  (includes  ears)

Do  you drive a 2-door or 4-door vehicle?   4  
Favorite  Number? 7

Favorite  movie ? AmelieFavorite book? The God of Small Things

Favorite  dessert? tiramasu

Where  do you see yourself in 10 years living in Pacific Northwest, being outdoors, having several children and some dogs, doing lots of yoga and cooking

 Furthest place you will send this message? Germany

 Who will respond the fastest ... ? ummm...I know who will respond NEVER...Daniel

Let's talk, Nuglett

Okay, Nugs, here's the deal.  Tomorrow is September 11th.  A perfectly fine day to be born...if you must...but we'd prefer, in light of all that is discussed, commemorated, debated, and tossed around in the media, if you'd wait.  Now, I know that your grandma practiced some of her L & D tricks today to potentially "get things started" but for 27 more hours, let's just stay the way we are.  You can continue to perform slightly painful maneuvers, stick appendages into my bladder, and create the most outstandingly-wicked heartburn ever...at least until 9/12.

What do you think, Noodle?

 At 9:30am, when I finally pulled myself out of bed, after another restless night of sleep (and disturbing dreams related to my two episodes of Dexter just before bed), I knew that today was stretched before me without any grandiose plans.  No adventures in the works.  Slate clear.

And so to find myself in the afternoon basking in the cuteness of Nico (and his mama, Valerie) as I sipped green tea and fawned over a spicy bowl of green curry with shrimp...was a delightful surprise.  Nico's outfit taught me the months in French.  His mom taught me, once again, just how joyous having a new baby could be.

With each hug that I give a friend, I am aware that I might have Nuggies swaddled up between us the next time.  This afternoon may be the final mid-week lunch that I relish "solo" for a while (no offense, Noodle, "solo" is a technicality).

I've decided that due dates are cruel.  Most midwifery or natural childbirth books, blogs, websites strongly advise you against paying them any mind...but I'm a creature of the Western Way.  I have long-since marked my calendar with Nuglett's potential arrival date...so it's just a waiting game at this point.  Constant Facebook messages asking if I've had the baby.  Emails inquiring if I feel anything yet.  Sweet voicemails curious about what's happening.

Nothing. Nada. Zip. Zero.

Today I squatted, cat/cowed, meditated, imagined, talked to and rubbed the belly, played the "laboring" soundtrack, walked, ate spicy food, swam my heart out...and I go to bed knowing that there's a seemingly infinite amount of time before I could finally meet M---- or N----- in the flesh.

How is that for a teaser on the names?  Fun, huh?

The "Nuglett Nooks Tour"

Those of you who know me outside of this blogosphere know that I tend to be fairly (or ridiculously, depending on your barometer) organized.  But this has been in the realm of work and my classroom...it has never translated into my home domain.

Now, due to the phenomenon of "nesting."  It has.  Daniel and I have worked over the months to slowly create honey-sweet nooks and crannies for Nuglett.  I thought I'd post them today...more than anything so I can look back in a few months and say, "Wow, the house was once really clean."

Here, Little Mouse, is your corner in our bedroom.  Lola Loi found the dangling yellow mobile recently in the Philippines and your changing table is right below.  The coolest wet/dry bags for your cloth diapers await the care packages...and I'm hoping I can figure out a good system of washing/drying and using these contraptions...otherwise the 7th Generation version is underneath for emergencies.

You can also see your co-sleeper.  Your father swears that you'll only by in our bed - right in between us- for months (or if he had his druthers - years)...but I think we'll just have to see.  I refuse to succumb to the prevailing sentiment in baby books and some relatives that I'm a bad mom if I don't snuggle and sleep with my baby until they're a toddler...or in school.

Here are "the goods" that are all going to the hospital.  The two gifts bags are for the nurses and the doula.  Having a mom that's been a nurse for 25 years has always helped me realize what an incredible job they perform.  In case you're curious what a nurse recommends for an appropriate "gift bag" gesture, I was told: 

good quality coffee (already ground)
box of chocolates or donuts 
healthy granola bars/snack bars/cookies

The doula gift back for Lauren contains various fun items...but since she peruses this blog...the contents will remain a mystery.

I also have a nursing pillow/contraption and the little suitcase with just a few items.  I know the mere fact that I packed this bag three weeks before my due date makes me the "typical first-time mom" but that's what I am and I like knowing that the clothes I want are comfy and clean inside.

 

This, Nuggles, is your dad's favorite corner.  While his mom was picking out a yellow mobile in the Filipino market, he was fingering this multi-colored version.  He also found these vibrant butterflies and wanted all of it to hang above your crib (your eventual crib that's in the garage for now).

This is the "Grandparents Nook" for all of our parents who will stay with us at various times in the next few weeks.  We have a comfy sleeper-sofa and on the walls are many pictures from the Philippines and also a painting by my Uncle Paul of my great-grandparents, Matt and Zora.  We can't wait for our Lola's and Lolo's to be with us! 

Aunties, uncles, and little cousins are coming, too!

And lastly, Noodle, here is the area that you and I may end up occupying the most.  A plush glider and ottoman, near a sun-drenched window, and all of your baskets of toys and books.

Sometimes your dad and I sit looking at this space...just sipping in the silence that still pervades throughout the house...then one of us will smile a big goofy grin.  We're so excited to meet you!

And this is Sophie about to lick her chops.  She's normally camera-shy but I caught her off-guard.  She may not like you getting real close...but she is my ultimate snuggle-girl and curls up with her paws up around my face each day.  Watching you kick underneath her belly has made me laugh many times.  She gets very perplexed by the movement and just has no idea how things will shift around here once you enter the scene.  But Daniel and I have vowed to keep paying as much attention (as possible) to our furries.

That concludes the "Nuglett Nooks Tour".  I'm sure that all of these locals will blend and transform after your arrival (and by "transform" I mean turn into total chaos and disaster that I won't mind).